• The Tenuous Purpose

    This Blog is built - not, as some might expect, on a flimsy whim but on a strong and single minded principle.

    That principle concerns Biscuits and their position in the world.

    We are really very keen on biscuits.
    As are many of you out there.
    We think.

    We wish to create an archive of Arrowroot, a backlog of Bourbons and a catalogue of Chocolate Fingers. Anybody can contribute an entry - or dispute somebody else's - provided they are not dull.
    Even Americans who perhaps don't really have the heritage of biscuitry that we are fortunate to have here.

    Or maybe they do and we are unaware of the full glory of the cookie.

    We realise that this whole subject is admirably and concisely dealt with by that excellent and unbeatable website A Nice Cup of Tea and a Sit Down. Our feeble efforts will be as the kicking of a gadfly in the face of their wisdom and experience but we hope that we may have a small contribution to make.

  • Biscuit Encounters on Twitter

  • The Synod of Biscuitry

    James Alexander-Sinclair of Blackpitts
    Gardener, Blogger, Journalist, Lecturer etc, etc. Much of his life is spent loafing around other people’s gardens issuing directives and generally cluttering up the place. However, like the great Mr Kipling, he does (occasionally) make exceptionally good gardens. (Although even Mr Kipling messed up a bit with the Carrot and Walnut Mini Classics.)

    Mark Diacono of Otter Farm
    He does sterling work growing many inappropriate plants in Devon. He dedicates a great deal of time and effort nurturing a plethora of plants that are (mostly) totally unsuited to our climate. His is a life of such extreme eccentric dedication that to start a Blog about Biscuits seems perfectly normal. He treads gently in the footsteps of people like the great William Buckland,a professor of Geology who claimed that he could tell location by tasting the local topsoil.

Marching on Its Stomach

In years gone by a relative of mine was in the army cadets and would, after finishing some weekend yomp through the woods somewhere, distribute the remains of his ration pack amongst anyone daft enough to be a taker. Being children we were impressed with being given even the most godawful cack.

There were two types of biscuit in the pack.

Those called “C biscuits” were like heavy duty Garibaldi’s and rarely made it home.

The others always did. They were, to look at, like rectangular, double-thickness Rich Teas, but tastewise were without any sugar, or much flavour, unless cardboard is  a flavour.

In fact they were like chunks of hardboard and came in a green plastic foil pack marked “AB Biscuits.”

It was rumoured the AB stood for Anal Blockage, and that they included ingredients intended to stop squaddies needing the to go behind a bush, whilst waiting to go over the top.

They were horrible and I suspect a good reason why we weren’t invaded by the Russians.

After all, any soldiers capable of eating them were capable of anything.

The Garden Monkey

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3 Responses

  1. My father was in the army and I remember falling upon the remains of his Compo rations packs. Most things came in blank tins with simple printing: Beans and Sausage. Chocolate Sponge Pudding, Jam, Cheese. Matches. All in tins. The cooking instructions were universal; pierce tin and put in boiling water for a bit.
    Except biscuits: as you say there were two sorts – Biscuits:sweet and Biscuits:Plain.Biscuits sweet were just edible while you would have to be pretty desperate to even try Biscuits:plain
    The best things were the handful of Spangles (that came in the same tin as the matches, I think). But the sweets of bygone eras is not a tin I feel I should open too much right now. That is a whole new Blog.

  2. Too right – especially if we were to explore the identity of the ‘Mystery Flavour’ Spangle…

  3. *salutes union jack, wipes away tear* Gawd bless the queen muvva

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