Do you remember Iced Gems? Weren’t they great?
If you answered yes to both those questions, then I suspect that you are suffering from some kind of False Memory Syndrome, because they were hateful little things.
Not really iced and certainly not gems, at least not in the sense of being “little wonders”. They were, I guess, gem-like in as much as they were as hard and as tasty to eat as precious stones.
Consisting of a small round plain biscuit along the lines of a Rich Tea, but about the size of a penny, topped with a swirl of what I believed as a child to be icing.
As an adult I now know that the substance that closest resembles the topping is in fact tile grout.
As a child you would of course eat anything if you believed it was biscuits, or sweets, of some kind despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary. But even these things were a trail.
My childhood contemporaries and I, inventive in the face of adversity, used to eat the most horrible bit (the icing) first, working our way through the packet.
This left you with a bag of tiny round biscuits, as I say a bit like little Rich Teas. But whereas the Rich Tea is a subtle biscuit, they had none of that and because they were so small were baked hard so that they were like something you’d feed to livestock.
Nevertheless, we munched our way through them, dreaming of Breakaways, Clubs and Penguins, and the day when we would be old enough to say “These are bloody horrible and I‘m not eating them”, without the risk of invoking a biscuit and sweet embargo from the grown-ups for being “ungrateful“.
The Garden Monkey