‘Networking’ is a necessary evil of the business world. Sometimes it can be interesting, with great people and topics, but it can also be dreadfully dull. Different faces, same conversations.
So imagine my response when a friend of time confessed that when he attends a networking event that is far from enthralling, he changes tack to make things more interesting.
When asked his profession, he replies, ‘Me? Well, I’m a biscuit designer.’
Imagine the faces. Disbelief, wonder, excitement…interest.
I laughed so hard when he told me my diaphragm ached for the next day, but then I began to wonder about biscuit designers – they have to exist – somewhere. I sort of imagine them in a kind of ‘Charlie and the Chocolate Factory’ invention room, surrounded by weird and wonderful ingredients, toppings and a myriad of shaped cutters.
And because I am a designer, it also made me look at the design of biscuits generally.
Why are most round as surely this is one of the most wasteful shapes when they are being punched out? Why are some only found in the round whilst others are both rectangular and round (like the Rich Tea)? Are they supposed to fulfil different functions? Are cream filled biscuits just wrong or bloody good value as you can overlook the fact with each helping you are actually eating two biscuits plus the filling?
Then I began to think about the biscuit I would design.
Would it be crumbly or well structured? Embossed? Any icing? Chocolate? Shape? Target audience? Calories per biscuit?
Well, despite being brought up to not play with me food, I would create an interactive biscuit experience. They would be packaged in a recycled card box for ease of delivery and protection, with minimal text, so you can scribble ideas for your creations on the box itself. The biscuits inside would be a series of shapes – some solid, some notched, some with holes – designed such that you could create your own edible 3D model before consuming the lot.
Of course, there would be no chocolate, as this would melt and disrupt the creative process, but some would have shiny hard and coloured icings which would allow interesting colour juxtaposition in the model.
You could even run a monthly competition on the biscuit’s website for the best ‘thing’ uploaded….
And what would I call them? Creatives? Biscuit Blocks? Who knows – but remember – you saw them here first…