• The Tenuous Purpose

    This Blog is built - not, as some might expect, on a flimsy whim but on a strong and single minded principle.

    That principle concerns Biscuits and their position in the world.

    We are really very keen on biscuits.
    As are many of you out there.
    We think.

    We wish to create an archive of Arrowroot, a backlog of Bourbons and a catalogue of Chocolate Fingers. Anybody can contribute an entry - or dispute somebody else's - provided they are not dull.
    Even Americans who perhaps don't really have the heritage of biscuitry that we are fortunate to have here.

    Or maybe they do and we are unaware of the full glory of the cookie.

    We realise that this whole subject is admirably and concisely dealt with by that excellent and unbeatable website A Nice Cup of Tea and a Sit Down. Our feeble efforts will be as the kicking of a gadfly in the face of their wisdom and experience but we hope that we may have a small contribution to make.

  • Biscuit Encounters on Twitter

  • The Synod of Biscuitry

    James Alexander-Sinclair of Blackpitts
    Gardener, Blogger, Journalist, Lecturer etc, etc. Much of his life is spent loafing around other people’s gardens issuing directives and generally cluttering up the place. However, like the great Mr Kipling, he does (occasionally) make exceptionally good gardens. (Although even Mr Kipling messed up a bit with the Carrot and Walnut Mini Classics.)

    Mark Diacono of Otter Farm
    He does sterling work growing many inappropriate plants in Devon. He dedicates a great deal of time and effort nurturing a plethora of plants that are (mostly) totally unsuited to our climate. His is a life of such extreme eccentric dedication that to start a Blog about Biscuits seems perfectly normal. He treads gently in the footsteps of people like the great William Buckland,a professor of Geology who claimed that he could tell location by tasting the local topsoil.

Cosy Biscuit

A poem plucked from the hedgerows of literature by Michelle Chapman.plain

Cosy Biscuit by Roger McGough

What I wouldn’t give for a nine to five
Biscuits in the right hand drawer,
teabreaks, and typists to mentally undress.

The same faces. Somewhere to hang
your hat and shake your umbrella.
Cosy. Everything in its place.

Upgraded every few years. Hobbies
Glass of beer at lunchtime
Pension to look forward to.

Two kids. Homeloving wife.
Bit on the side when the occasion arises
H.P. Nothing fancy. Neat semi.

* * *

What I wouldn’t give for a nine to five.
Glass of beer in the right hand drawer
H.P. on everything at lunchtime

The same 2 kids. Somewhere to hang
your wife and shake your bit on the side.
Teabreaks and a pension to mentally undress

The same semifaces upgraded.
Hobbies every few years, neat typists
in wet macs when the umbrella arises.

What I wouldn’t give for a cosy biscuit.

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5 Responses

  1. *Dreams of what might have been*

  2. I can hear Roger McGough speaking the poem as I read it.

    Some people won’t know H.P. is being used in 2 different ways – H.P. as in Hire Purchase (a common way of buying goods like furniture before the advent of credit cards) and also as in HP Sauce – that most delectable of ketchups also known as brown sauce. Yum.

    • Thanks for clearing up the H.P. for us, VP. I had no idea what that was about. I do know what 9 to 5, typists, pensions and the rest are though. An excellent offering to this fine biscuit bloggery.
      Frances

  3. Someone needs to do a gardener’s version of this (I’m not volunteering!). Perhaps call it soggy biscuit?

  4. Oh 9-5 life — for me, you’re like McDonald’s food. When I don’t have you, I long for you; when I get you, I feel used and dirty.

    To read this brings a tear to my freelancer eye. I’m working away but no-one is chastising me for gazing out of the window, wearing my dressing gown surfing the web and listening to the radio.

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