• The Tenuous Purpose

    This Blog is built - not, as some might expect, on a flimsy whim but on a strong and single minded principle.

    That principle concerns Biscuits and their position in the world.

    We are really very keen on biscuits.
    As are many of you out there.
    We think.

    We wish to create an archive of Arrowroot, a backlog of Bourbons and a catalogue of Chocolate Fingers. Anybody can contribute an entry - or dispute somebody else's - provided they are not dull.
    Even Americans who perhaps don't really have the heritage of biscuitry that we are fortunate to have here.

    Or maybe they do and we are unaware of the full glory of the cookie.

    We realise that this whole subject is admirably and concisely dealt with by that excellent and unbeatable website A Nice Cup of Tea and a Sit Down. Our feeble efforts will be as the kicking of a gadfly in the face of their wisdom and experience but we hope that we may have a small contribution to make.

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  • The Synod of Biscuitry

    James Alexander-Sinclair of Blackpitts
    Gardener, Blogger, Journalist, Lecturer etc, etc. Much of his life is spent loafing around other people’s gardens issuing directives and generally cluttering up the place. However, like the great Mr Kipling, he does (occasionally) make exceptionally good gardens. (Although even Mr Kipling messed up a bit with the Carrot and Walnut Mini Classics.)

    Mark Diacono of Otter Farm
    He does sterling work growing many inappropriate plants in Devon. He dedicates a great deal of time and effort nurturing a plethora of plants that are (mostly) totally unsuited to our climate. His is a life of such extreme eccentric dedication that to start a Blog about Biscuits seems perfectly normal. He treads gently in the footsteps of people like the great William Buckland,a professor of Geology who claimed that he could tell location by tasting the local topsoil.

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Gginger – A Truly Remarkable Biscuit. Chapter 2 – The Great Escape

Gginger landed on the shop floor and took a deep breath.  He hadn’t realised that he had been holding his breath for so long.  He was relieved to have finally made it down the sheer face of the supermarket shelving and to reach the ground.

I don’t know how he got down from the top shelf, he didn’t tell me.  But I do know that Gginger was very scared and there were several moments when his feet had lost their grip and he thought it was all over and he would be swept up the next morning when the cleaners came in. That was it now, there was no going back, no way would he be able to climb back to the top shelf and his gingerbread friends.

Gginger looked around him and was suddenly very scared.  He had been so busy concentrating on getting out of the packaging and down from the top shelf that he hadn’t stopped to think about what he was going to do when he got to the ground.  He felt so small, he could barely see above the bottom shelf.  The aisle stretched away from him to the left and right disappearing far into the distance.  Not only was Gginger overwhelmed by the sheer size of the aisle but also by the silence. Gginger had got used to the noise of the shoppers and night time staff as well as his friends sniffing and shuffling around in the packet but now the only sound was a faint droning noise  coming from somewhere in the supermarket.  Gginger didn’t like the sound. It sounded like something he really didn’t want to encounter so he decided that if possible he would move in the opposite direction. Of course, if we had been there we would have told Gginger that he needn’t worry it was only the motors of the refrigeration units.

What to do now?  He must make a decision quickly as he had a lot of ground to cover before the morning cleaners appeared.  He could see some light coming from the left and decided that it would be a good idea to head towards the light rather than the darkness which lurked at the other end of the aisle.  You and I would know that the lights Gginger was heading towards was the glare of the street lights outside the store windows, but for Gginger it was a light that held the promise of freedom and adventure. He set off at a run, keeping close to the shelving as it made him feel safer than being out in the middle of the aisle.

Suddenly, the light he was heading towards changed.  It split and divided and one of the lights started to move around in a strange bobbing motion.  Gginger froze, his breathe dried in his throat, his heart was beating even faster than when he had started the descent from the top shelf.  He felt sick with anticipation.  As the light moved towards Gginger a silhouette started to separate from the background darkness.  What was it?  Some strange monster with two heads, two pairs of eyes and six legs!

Gginger kept edging backwards until his back was right up against the shelving unit.  There was nowhere to hide.  Gginger felt sure that whatever the monster was it would spot him straight away and his life would end in seconds.  He must hide and quickly.  With reluctance he pulled his gaze away from the approaching monster and turning his back on it, he started to pull himself up on to the bottom shelf.  He was exhausted with the effort it took, as well as all the running and climbing he had already done that night, but Gginger eventually pulled his weary body through a small gap between some packets of crackers and waited for the monster to approach…….

Helen Johnstone


2 Responses

  1. When oh when will the next part be with us?!

  2. I havent written any more as I didnt think any one was reading my ramblings! If you want more ramblings about gingerbread men I will oblige

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